Quitting a Job

After serving for 7 years and 8 months in an organisation, I quit my job. I did not have any idea on how to draft my farewell mail, like everyone I looked at the other farewell mails I received and even searched on Google. It was of no use.

Then I thought may be I should look for a suitable line from one of my favourite movies and then draft a note around it. I logged on to imdb.com to look for movie Quotes. I first looked at Ocean's Eleven, Twelve & Thirteen, didn't find anything. And then I checked out Spiderman 1, 2 & 3 still din't find anything. I almost gave up on the movie line thing and that is when I remembered Captain Jack Sparrow! I knew there will be some dialogue of his that will suit my requirement. And I found one. Plus my friend Leeni sent me some lines I could use on my farewell mail. Here is the farewell mail I sent out...

____________________________________________________________________________

Subject Line: Elvis has left the Building ! ! !

Dear All,


“You long for freedom. You long to do what you want to do because you want it. You want to see what it's like. One day you won't be able to resist”
                                                  - Captain Jack Sparrow, Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest.

And the day has arrived. I quit and today will be my last day in MphasiS; I’m abandoning this ship to dive into the BIG BLUE Ocean to explore stranger tides.

I would like to thank each one of you, who stood by me, inspired me and supported me throughout my association with MphasiS, without which I wouldn’t have reached this far.
I would also like to thank the people that I worked with, who made my career here exciting and challenging.

It’s been a pleasure working with you all, I wish you all the very best in everything that you do and do keep in touch. You can find me on the World Wilde Web, specifically on Face Book and Linked In.

Every goodbye makes the next hello closer.

Cheers!
V
My E-Mail Address: vcygnus@gmail.com
My Blog: http://vipages.blogspot.com

Note: Caution has been taken to ensure regular phrases like mixed feelings, roller coaster ride, wonderful learning experience, etc are not used.
____________________________________________________________________________

Until I sent this mail out everything appeared to be fine only when I got off my desk and started meeting people to say Good Bye did I realise that it is not that easy to bid farewell to the people and the place where you've spent close to 8 years. Here I'm not talking about the difficulty that is a result of an emotional connection but the number of people that one had to speak to in one day. One day wasn't enough. I didn't feel bad about leaving that place or the people because in the world of twitters and facebook keeping in touch is really not a big challenge.

All the people I met wished me luck, a couple of them tried to convince me that I've made a hasty decision, couple of them gave me gifts, some of them expressed disappointment, a lot of them spoke about my farewell mail stating it was indeed a good one, some of them also read my blog and came back with comments and praises, some of them even caught the hidden message on my e-mail which indicates where I'm going next (IBM - the BIG BLUE). So overall it was really nice to meet most of the people I've worked with and they all have left some good memories in me. So its been a long innings and now I have a lot more friends...

Goodbye MphasiS and Hello IBM!

Are Superheros really Super?

I recently watched Superman Returns with friends (Home Video) and noticed the stricking resemblance the superman story had with spiderman. Superman Returns was such a boring movie that I lost interest after the first 30 minuts and went back to playing games on my mobile phone while my friends watched the rest of the movie. After that incident, I don't think I will ever be able to watch another superhero movie.

And most of the superhero movies have a similar story line as well. The hero has some sort of superpower due to which he is a super hero, he leads a normal life like others but when there is a problem he'll chage into this extensively complicated and uncomfortable outfit and go out to save the world. No one shows how long a superhero takes to put on or strip down to the super suit and take off. Towards the end of the movie the villan always overpowers the superhero and either someone comes for the superhero's rescue or he takes some time off to regain all his super powers. And then there will be a lengthy climax stunt sequence afterwhich the superhero either kills the villan or the villan is sent out of the world or under water depending on whether the director wants him in the next sequel or not. Most of all, all superheros maintain their secret identity in such a way that no one will know that its the same guy who hangs around normal people actually turns into a superhero. The shameless IronMan is exempted from the secret identity rule as he shamelessly called for a press meet and told them that he is IronMan in the very first movie.

The more I thought about these superheros, I started to notice something. All the superheros we have today have a superpower which is uniques to that hero, we don't see a super hero who has all the superpowers combined that we have come across. This might not sound strange but what is actually strange is that the problems that each superhero faces. Each problem that a superhero faces is verymuch within the limits of that particular superhero's super powers. For example:

Spiderman:

• In a spiderman movies / comics all the problems will happen in downtown most of the time, especially around sky scrappers, bridges or places where spiderman can stick his web and keep swinging around.
• Even if the villan has to create trouble for the general public or for sipderman, he will ensure that he is hanging around sky scrappers or bridges.
• You never see a spiderman stunt sequence by the country side or in a farm or in the middle of the ocean.

Superman:

•  In superman movies / comics all problems will occur high up in the skies or under water.
• Same rule applies to the villan as well. if he is creating chaos, he has to do it way up in the sky or under water.
• If Superman had to fly through downtown, he will bang into every other sky scrapper and eventually die.

Phantom:

• All the problems in a Phantom movie or comics has to happen around the forest he lives in most of the time.
• The villans can never posses highly sophisticated weapons to fight the superhero instead they are allowed to use handguns provided they stand at an arms distance from the hero to fight him. Only then Phantom can deliver his signature punch. 

Batman:

• The Villans in a Batman movie / comics have to be tech savy and keep inventing new gadgets that could destroy the world or Gotham city the least, otherwise all the gadgets that batman invents will never be put to use.
• Most of the problems that occur or that is created by the villan in batman movies / comics have to happen in places that the batmobile or any other of batman's gadgets could access.

Robin:

• This guy is the most ridiculous intern any superhero has ever had.
• Even after years of internship he still hangs around with Batman, I can't think of any speciality that this guy has.
• This guy keeps falling for every second woman he sees and everytime batman has to save him.

So Moral of the Story: These superheros are only superheros as long as the villans & the venues where the problems occur remain the same. If you have to simply interchange the villans, these superheros will cease to exist in less than 15 minutes. Superheros aren't really that super....

Just Look At'em....

If you are still wondering in what way this candle is digital, let me explain. The candle is made in the shape of number 7 which is a digit. Hence its called the digital candle!!!

I was reading a "Panchatantra stories" book meant for kids. I came across this pretty lame story and guess what the moral of the story is, "Dreams can never become reality." Is that what you want a kid to think? What kind of an idiot will put someting like that in the first place? Doesn't anyone review the contents before its published and sent out for sale?? This is not it, check out the next picture....

This was another story in the same book that comes towards the end. In this story they show a guy dreaming and then in the very next page his dream comes true!!! Didn't they just say that dreams can never become reality? I really feel sad for the kids who end up buying these kind of books...

This book is published by "Sree Book Center" based out of Mumbai.

This guy has given a tamil name in exactly the same way it is pronounced by tamilians for his coffee shop! Interesting....

I hate destroying the environment, so what did I do when some random guy handed over a notice while I was walking past a busy street? Well I made a tree out of the paper and planted it back. I made a tree out of something that was made out of a tree!!!

Stupid Advertisements

I'm not sure if its mandated by the IPL Governing Council that all companies that advertise during the IPL matches should only make stupid advertisements, because each ad that was shown during prime time has been worse than the other. If there is one reason why I won't buy these products that will be because of their advertisements.

What do these ad film makers think? that they can boost sales with those crappy advertisements? I wish those companies that are paying a bomb to get these advertisements switch to better ad agencies and make sensible ads. This will not only help drive sales but also keep the brand image intact.

I have classified such ads into two broad categories, stupid ads and lame ads. Well some of them fall under both the categories and we can't help that. Here are some that i can recall.... (majority of them are ads for mobile phones made in India).


MAXX Mobiles: (Stupid Ad)
The series of ads featuring M S Dhoni where he say what features were there in his maxx mobile and that his phone has been stolen. I wonder if this ad was made by maxx mobile or one of its competitors, because what i interpret from this ad is that if you buy a maxx mobile it will be stolen for sure so either steal a maxx mobile from someone or don't buy one at all.

Couple of years back smasung used to advertise a special feature in its mobiles phones where if a handset is stolen the owner will be able to trace where the instrument is and potentially even catch the thief. Two years later maxx mobile advertises that their instrument is stolen and there is no way you can trace it!!!!

If you wish to watch this ad please go to:
http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=maxx+mobile+dhoni&aq=f


Spice Mobile: (Stupid Ad)

There is this ad where they show a dude watching Jodha Akbar in his mobile and his friend comes with another memory card. This dude removed his memory card from the phone and the next thing we see is all the Jodha Akbar characters including the elephant leaving his house. Then they fade out and show the Spice Intelligent Querty Phone with dual memory card slot?!?!?!? Will it not make sense to make a phone with one memory card slot that can handle more memory space in the form of extendable memory.

Buying one memory card with a bigger storage space is much more economical that buying multiple memory cards whose storage space adds up to the bigger memory card. Kudos to their R & D team, you guys should be in the museum.

If you wish to watch this ad please go to:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fga_pu2DE8s


Carbon Mobiles: (Stupid & Lame Ad)
All the ads featuring Virendra Sewag and Gautam Ghambir for carbon mobiles are stupid and lame. There is this solo ad of Sewag where he tries to flip a mobile phone in his hand and moves his arms and head like a woman. Then he says, "I'm dashing. I'm carbon" in the worst english accent you can ever imagine. That ad was so lame that it went off the air in a day or two after its first telecast. I think even Sewag's kids and family members would've laughed their guts out watching that ad. I'll not be even surprised if Sewag himself requested carbon mobiles to remove that ad as he was losing credibility everywhere.

There is another similar ad with Ghambir where he does the same actions as that of Sewag slightly better though and says, "I'm solid. I'm carbon."

The third ad features both Sewag and Ghambir fighting to attend a call from some vidhya because both their sim cards are in the same phone (dual sim option!) and then later when the coach calls they ask eachother to answer the phone. Both these guys act as if they are gay in this ad.

If you wish to see these ads, please search on the internet and let me know when you find them. Unfortunately I'm unable to find these ads in youtube.


Micromax Mobiles: (Stupid Ad)
The advertisement is kind of ok but its their tagline that makes you wonder what the hell are they trying to say. It says "Nothing like anything." Why on earth will any sane human being buy a phone that is nothing like anything at all??? Also the ones where Akshay Kumar laughs like a lunatic, what was he thinking?


JK Cement: (Stupid Ad)
This is an ad I still wonder what the hell are they trying to say. They show this horrible looking chick (due to  excessive make up) walk out of the ocean wearing a red swimsuit (similar to the one Pamela Anderson and Carmen Electra wore in Baywatch). Then the next think you see on the screen is JK cement. Short and stupid!

If you wish to watch this ad please go to:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P2cqlw3pwFw


Clinic All Clear: (Lame Ad)
This is the ad featuring either Bipasha or Asin where they show a big auditorium full of audience. Then Bipasha or Asin call upon a couple of girls, flash light on their heads and show the audience a magnified image of the same. The girl that scores a zero is considered the winner of the contest and zero mean zero dandruff! And the woman who scored a zero says, "YES I knew it!" How lame can you get?

If you wish to watch this ad please go to:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w9yNpE2fwN4


Hero Honda: (Lame & Stupid Ads)
Now here is one company that has a reputation for making the most stupid and lame advertisements of all times. Every single ad made by hero honda is horrible, just search for hero honda on you tube watch any ad you feel like you'll know what I mean.

Here is my message for hero honda, if you really want to know how make good and classy advertisements for two wheelers, watch the commercials of Bajaj. Even now we all remember the hamara bajaj song, hodibaba and the Pulser ad that had dramatised stunts performed by stunt artists was the just out of the world. Show what is possible in your two wheelers don't show all the impossible stuff and expect people to believe in your product.


Gariner Fairness Skin: (Stupid Ad)
This is the ad featuring actress Genelia, she starts off with says why do people speak so much about fairness creams, what's going to happen by talking so much and then ad goes on for 30 seconds where she and a voice over keeps talking non stop. What the hell are they trying to say???

If you wish to watch this ad please go to:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MoDnhSxnFhQ

The IPL Thievs

We'd bought some tickets for a couple of IPL league matches. when we went for the first match at bangalore chinnaswamy stadium, there were RCB flags kept on each chair. After the match we took those flags with us as we wanted to put it up in our houses, bring it back for the next match, etc. Last weekend we went for the match again and carried those flags with us to cheer for RCB.

We even bought some stuff outside the stadium that we can use to cheer once we're at the stand. When we were just about to get in the guards at the gate told us to remove the stick off the flag and throw it away before we get in. When we asked them for the reason, we were told that its a security measure to prevent people from throwing those stuff into the ground or at the players.

Though it sounded insane, with the best interest of getting in we threw the sticks away and got in. We also had to throw all the other stuff we just bought outside the stadium.

Well we were totally outraged when we got in, just after we entered the gate we saw this small stall on the right side called the 'IPL Store' (they said it is a reebock store) where you can buy the same stick that they asked you to throw away just before you got in at FIFTY BUCKS per stick!!! Not just that even the other stuff that we were asked to throw away were sold at an insane price. And the best part is if you don't produce the bill for items bought at the IPL Store before you enter the gallery, you will not be allowed to take them in.

Looks like every one is trying to make big money riding the IPL wave and in the bargain you get pushed to the limits.

This was that damn store I was talking to you about.

Calvin & Hobbes

I'm not a great fan / reader of comic books. As a kid I've read a lot of comics, mostly Laurel & Hary, Tinkle & Archie. If there is one cartoon strip that grabbed my attention all together is Calvin & Hobbes. I still wonder how Bill Waterson ever managed to create such a legendary cartoon strip series of all times.

This cartoon strip came out in the mid eighties and went on till about the late ninteys. What is really amazing about Calvin and Hobbes is that even if you read it today it will seem as if it was created / written yesterday. These are cartoon strips that will never get old.

Calvin & Hobbes is witty, humorous, hillarious (well all these pretty much mean the same but this is too good that i chose to use all these words) & addictive. The kind of stuff (depicted) this 6 year old kid comes up with in these cartoon strips some times make you think. Many of these episodes leave you in splits and this can get pretty additive as you read along.

The best part of this series is you don't need to read it from the begenning to be able to follow it. You can pick up any random cartoon strip and you will enjoy it.

You can subscribe for Calvin and Hobbes for free at: http://www.gocomics.com/. They will send you a cartoon strip a day by e-mail.

Here are some of the lines I really enjoyed from the Calvin & Hobbes cartoon strips I've read so far...

(Note: Some of these lines may sound very ordinary but if you know the actual context in which these were spoken they will turn out to be funny.)

A day can slip by if you are deliberately avoiding what you are supposed to do.

When in doubt deny all terms and definitions.

Nothing spoils fun like finding out it builds character.

Its only work if somebody makes you do it.

Reality continues to ruin my life.

The joke is never as funny the second time you hear it.

It doesn't hurt to take precautions.

When your strategy is to run like a squirrel, its hard to come up with a good taunt.

Life is full of surprises, but never when you need one.

Genius is never understood in its own time.

Why waste time learning when ignorance is instantaneous.

Exercise is a lot more gratifying if you count what you feel like.

I always forget the purpose of competition is to divide people into winners and losers.

You know how people are. They only recognise greatness when some authority confirms it.

A good compromise leaves everybody mad.

On seeing a milk packet, ''i dont want to take chances with a product that prints the date you might expire.

I thrive on change. I thrive on making other people change.

Calvin: Memories of a six year old.

My life has been a fascinating series of amazing exploits about which i have many profound insights. But frankly, none of it is any of your darn business, so butt out! The End.

Susie: What do you think that cloud looks like?
Calvin: A bunch of suspended water and ice particles, why?
Calvin: Everybody hates a literalist.

I dont think you should have to do something unless you're enthusiastic about it.

I'm a 21st century kid trapped in a 19th century family.

Love the sinner hate the sin.

Geniuses should be given special consideration.

My whole problem is my lips move when i think.

Its a lot more fun to blame things than to fix them.

You can't just turn on creativity like a faucet. You have to be in the right mood.

True happiness comes from a life of virtue. - Hobbes.

It must be depressing to go through life with no purpose.

It doesnt matter if you win or lose. Its how you play the game.

My brain wishes my ego had call waiting.

If you feel like doing some work, sit down and wait until that feeling goes away.

Definition of a pronoun - A noun that lost its amateur status.

Teacher: Calvin which state do you live in?
Calvin: Denial!
Teacher: Can't argue with that.

Mom: wake up Calvin, early bird gets its worm.
Calvin: Yuck....

Its tough being the sole guardian of high culture. Talent like ours carries such enormous responsibility.

Its a funny world, but its not a hilarious world unless you like sick humor. The world is probably funnier to people who dont live here.

The more indecisive you are the faster things get decided.

My relatives are people i don't relate to.

Life's a lot more fun when you're not responsible for your actions.

I obey the letter of the law if not the spirit.

Your ego is writing checks your body can't cash

I find my life is a lot easier the lower i keep everyone's expectations.

People pay more attention to you when they think you're up to something.

You can take the tiger out of the jungle, but you can't take the jungle out of the tiger..

My body doesn't believe a word my brain is saying.

Spinning the Web

I am a great fan of Spiderman and I have always felt that there are a lot of powerful dialogues in the Sipderman movies that can actually boost your morale. Here are some of the lines from the Spiderman movies that has in a way inspired me.


These are lines from Peter Parker / Spiderman:

With great power comes great responsibilities. This is my gift, my curse. Who am I? I'm SPIDERMAN.

Sometimes responsibilities do make up most of our life.

Whatever comes our way, even if a battle is raging within us, we always have a choice. My friend Harry taught me that. He chose to be the best of himself

When you do terrible things and want to set things right you start with doing the toughest thing. Forgive yourself.

Here's the truth. There are eight million people in this city. And those teeming masses exist for the sole purpose of lifting the few exceptional people

We all have choices and those choices makes us what we are. So we can always make a choice to do the right thing.

Not everyone is meant to make a difference. But for me, the choice to lead an ordinary life is no longer an option.

Sometimes, you know people. You can see whats coming.

The real crime must be not to finish what we started.

No matter what I do. No matter how hard I try. The ones I love will always be the ones who pay.

Sometimes in life we have to give up the things we want the most.


These are lines from the other characters in the movies:

And Lord knows, kids like Henry need a hero. Courageous, self-sacrificing people. Setting examples for all of us. Everybody loves a hero. People line up for them, cheer them, scream their names. And years later, they'll tell how they stood in the rain for hours just to get a glimpse of the one who taught them how to hold on a second longer. I believe there's a hero in all of us, that keeps us honest, gives us strength, makes us noble, and finally allows us to die with pride, even though sometimes we have to be steady, and give up the thing we want the most. Even our dreams. - Aunt May


I believe there is a hero in all of us that keeps us honest gives us strength, makes us noble and finally allows us to die with pride. - Aunt May


Every dream needs a hero to bring it to life. - Aunt May

You cant live with revenge in your heart. It is like a poison. It can take you over before you know it and turn you into something ugly. - Aunt May

We've all done terrible things to each other, but we have to forgive each other. Or everything we ever were will mean nothing. Mary Jane

There are eight million people in this city. And those teeming masses exist for the sole purpose of lifting the few exceptional people onto their shoulders. You and me.... We're exceptional. - Green Goblin.


No matter what you do for them, eventually they will hate you. - Green Goblin