Leeni: I burnt my hand.
Chai: Apply some soya sause.
Vimal: why did the mother in law sleep off?
Chai: What!?!?!?!?!?!
Vimal: ya soya in hindi means slept off and saas means mother-in-law right?
Chai: oh God.
While passin by Leeni's office,
Leeni: this is where somebody planted a bomb once.
Russel: did it grow?
Leeni: ha... ha... ha...
While eating at MTR,
Leeni: This cabbage tastes funny.
Russel: You feel like laughing?
Leeni: he... He... He...
Vimal: hey you guys start today, I'll take a train tomorrow and get there.
Leeni: but you'll not get tickets this is a holiday season.
Vimal: we'll talk to Lalu.
Russel: why?
Vimal: he is the ex-minister for indian railways that's why.
Russel: then he'll give you ex-tickets.
Vimal: ?!?!?!
We were leaving to Goa for the New Years and Chai came over to say goodbye,
Russel: Chai, why don't you come along?
Chai: no, you guys carry on.
Russel: come as it is, whats the problem.
Chai: No, you guys carry on
Vimal: Russel, let me ask him just half the question that you asked. Come. Ass.
Chai: hey Monkey.
Vimal: what's that guys name?
Russel: Viki.
Vimal: what happens when this guy goes to the loo?
Russel: _________ what happens?
Vimal: it will be vikileaks.
Russel: he... He... He...
Roy: ha ha, cops will catch you now.
Leeni: who'll throw him but?
Roy: ?!?!?!?!
While driving to Goa,
Amith: That truck driver was close.
Vimal: was he your relative or family friend or something?
Amith: why?
Vimal: You just said he was close.
Amith: !?!?!?!
Vimal: nonsence, I'm transferring all my brownie points to you.
Amith: Thank You.
Vimal: later when the time is right I'll take all that back from you.
Amith: That'll never happen.
Vimal: You didn't see that movie yesterday
? They said, ''You get more by giving.''
Amith: That's correct. I get more when you give.
Vimal: ?!?!?!?
Amith: The GPS says we have 224 kilometers left to cover.
Vimal: If it says 224 kms left, why are we going straight instead of going left?
Everyone in the car: ____________
Vimal: No one wants to get back to me on this one?..... ?!?!?!?!
Vimal: I think it requires a catalyst.
Leeni: What is a catalyst?
Vimal: In a chemical reaction, when the reactants are unable to...
Amith: when you make a list of all the cattles you have, its called a catalyst.
Vimal: ?!?!?!?!?!?
Vimal grabs a book just after finishing dinner.
Amith: You ate too much?
Vimal: Why do you ask?
Amith: You are reading Readers Digest, that's why I asked.
Vimal: !?!?!?!?!?
Roy: What is g-force?
Amith: When you are forcing someone with respect its called Ji-Force.
Roy: Forget it....
Amith: What is the opposite of insult?
Roy: Praise? Honor?
Amith: Its Outsult dude.
Roy: !?!?!?!?!?!?
Amith: Can you reduce the fan?
Vimal: Sorry, there is only one fan in this room, if I reduce this, there'll not be any fan left.
Amith: !?!?!?!?
On reading a name board on a taxi,
Amith: 'Shankar Travels.' Big deal so do we.
Everyone in the car: ha... ha... ha... ha...
Vimal: Where did you get the coconut from?
Leeni: From the coconut tree.
Vimal: !?!?!?!?!?!?
Roy: Give me the goggles let me try it out.
Amith: You can't try it 'OUT' because you are inside the car.
Roy: !?!?!?!?!?!?
Amith: wow, such a long bridge.
Roy: we have bridges all over goa.
Amith: Bugger. You can't have bridges all over, they'll be on roads.
Roy: God.
Vimal: From now on till we leave Goa, there is only onething I want to feast on.
Russel: What?
Vimal: Sea Food.
Amith: That's fine but you should also eat the food after you've seen food.
I recently called ICICI customer care to close my credit card account. The guy I spoke to was not conviced with my justification for closing my credit card. I'd decided not to use credit cards hence was getting rid of it. He tried explaining how a credit card can be useful in emergencies and its a life time free card so I can still keep the card and not use it. I tried explaining him that I understand all that and I still wanted to close the account. Inspite of me telling why I wanted to close the card, the guy kept asking me repeatedly why I'm closing the card which frustrated. Finally I put an end to this viscious cycle as follows,
ICICI guy: Any particular reason why you are closing this card?
Vimal: Like I told you mutiple times during this call I've decided not to use credit cards hence closing all my credit card accounts.
ICICI guy: ok, but is there any particular reason why you are closing the credit card?
Vimal: _______........ Well I'm closing this credit card because I did not like your TV commercials.
ICICI guy: I'm sorry sir, come again.
Vimal: I didn't like your TV commercial where you show the staff celebrating a customer's birthday with a candle on a ladoo. I felt that that ad was kind of stupid so I want to close the card. Can you close my account now please?
ICICI guy: ?!?!?!?!....... Ok, I'm closing your account and your confirmation number is...
And finally the consumer wins!
